Trevor's Graduation

This past weekend was BYU graduation. First, I'll say that I'm so proud of Trevor for pushing through, sticking around for an extra year to get a masters degree, and for tackling a semester with a class load way more than normal (24 credit hours) so that he could be done in time for graduation! He seriously has been so great at using his time wisely--getting stuff done at school and still leaving ample time for mid-semester vacations and lots of quality time with me. All the while never really stressing (too much) about getting it all done. He's definitely a cougar that deserves a

Ra, ra, ra, ra, ra,
Ra, ra, ra, ra, ra,
Ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, GOOOOO COUGAR!

I think like all monumental moments in our life it's hard for me to not feel like Luke should be with us. Of course, I know that he shouldn't because if he were supposed to be here, Heavenly Father would have made it that way. Yet it felt so void to be empty armed as we gathered around to take our celebratory pictures around campus.

Trevor graduated from the BYU Marriot School of Management, which happens to be voted the most "family friendly." I love that about BYU and love that Trevor's particular college received such an award. During the graduation ceremonies the dean of the school took time to acknowledge and applaud a variety of groups of people mostly within the graduating class; however, one group he asked to stand was all the spouses and children of the graduates. I stood. I stood alone even though in my minds eye I stood holding an adorable 8-month-old, smiling baby. I wished the people around me could see that it wasn't just me that is part of Trevor's family. I wished everyone else could know that Luke is a part of our family too. Oh how I longed for him to be there with us, in my arms, as his daddy's little supporter.

Those couple days I had a desire to hold a baby more than usual. Anywhere we went I felt a longing to have a baby in my own arms--these instances at BYU, walking around Costco, at lunch--wherever we were there were other's with their children and I wanted so badly for that to be me too.

Luke, you were missed this past weekend as we celebrated your dad's accomplishments with our family and friends. You, of course, are always missed but the void was so noticeable without you with us. Perhaps you were able to give a little cheer for your dad from your heavenly location. Perhaps you were more with us than I realize. We love you and wish you could have been with us during all the fun celebrations! Love, your mommy.