Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Life Is Hard

In the past couple weeks I have had some very dear friends struggle with miscarriage, pregnancy complications, and adoption issues. Why can't this baby business be a sure thing?! It breaks my heart to watch these wonderful women deal with these trials. 

After I got off of the phone with one of them, I said out loud, "Life is hard." And I thought in my head I can handle hard things, but why do they have to experience them too?

I wish I could take these trials away from my friends. I love them so much and hope and even pray that the Lord will grant them the desires of their hearts. 

An anonymous comment on my blog was from a mother who was directed to my blog after losing her baby. I cried. I love and admire the women who have gone through what I have gone through and turn to them for hope and inspiration. I knew that there were women before me that have experienced the loss of their sweet angel babies, but I hadn't thought about the women that will come after me. It breaks my heart to know that other's are yet to experience this pain. I wish I could stop it. I wish I could prevent it. I wish no one else had to go through this. 

Unfortunately, my wish will not be granted. 

I read some surprising statistics I found over at I Am The Face

  • 25-50% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage (
  • Stillbirths (the death of a baby after 20 weeks gestation) occur in one in every 160 pregnancies–about 60 stillborn babies every single day (March of Dimes).
  • Each year, in the US alone, about 20,000 babies die in their first month of life, many after being born prematurely (March of Dimes).
  • SIDS is the leading cause of death among infants ages 1 month to 1 year.
  • Every single day in the US 2,000 women lose a baby to pregnancy/infant loss. That's 700,000 a year, a quarter of every female in this country.

  • Aren't those numbers astounding? It has been incredible to me how many stories of loss I've heard now that I too am part of this group. Not many have been 41 weeks along, like I was, but no matter when the loss occurs, I believe, it is heartbreaking. 

    "No matter the burdens we face in life ... we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father, who sent us to earth as part of His eternal plan for our growth and progress. Our unique individual experiences can help us prepare to return to Him. The adversity and afflictions that are ours, however difficult to bear, last from heaven's perspective, for 'but a small moment; and then, if [we] endure it well, God shall exalt [us] on high.' We must do everything we can to bear our burdens 'well' for however long our 'small  moment' carrying them lasts." (L. Whitney Clayton, That Your Burdens May Be Light)

    I know that my prayers can't and won't stop infant and pregnancy loss, however; I just realized that perhaps I should pray that these women may be able to bear their burdens and endure them well. And if we can endure, what a glorious promise! To be exalted on high.